Watch Out Humans

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/06/25/science/25voice.html?hpw

ANNOUNCEMENT

TWEEDLE DEE TWEEDLE DOM ON AN INDEFINITE LEAVE OF ABSENCE.
AUTHOUR CRIPPLED BY SELF-DOUBT

Snacking: A Tradition Revisited

Since I graduated from college I have been exposed to various new things in my life such as jobs, old friends, new boyfriends, the dirty martini, and dive bars. If I had to choose one thing that's been a fixture in my life since the beginning it's been snacking. I know this seems like it's coming from way out in left field, but I recently had an episode on an airplane where my blood sugar dropped so low I had two seizures and I had to beg the flight attendants not to have an emergency landing somewhere in Indiana. But that's another story for another day. This fate full plane ride made me realize something: if there is one thing in my life that will never change it is that I must keep snacking. Let's forget gourmet for right now and talk about the bare necessities: string cheese, applesauce, crackers of any sort or brand, yogurt, raisins, and granola, only to name a few.

I work at a small elementary school where snack time is the highlight of my students' (and my) day. Every morning a cheerfull mother or nanny walks into the classroom carrying our classroom's monogrammed Lands End canvas tote filled with goodies. Usually it's string cheese, carrot sticks, or pretzels. Somedays, and these are the best days, we'll get bombarded with mini bagels and cream cheese, hummus, some sort of organic cheese snacks from Whole Foods that I would never buy for myself, or mini cups of smoothie from Jamba Juice. These days I linger for an extra minute at the snack table and set aside a small plate of treats for myself. For later, or for now; I don't care. I gotta keep my blood sugar up somehow

top 3 phrases I overuse

#1 ... As such

#2 ... That said

#3 ... Variations of  'I'm not kidding'

I'm acutely aware of these issues. That said, they're probably not going to change.

Words to live by...

"Listen, the rumours of my sobriety are greatly exaggerated. And we'll leave it at that."

- Keith Richards

Nicorette's new ad is kinda good.

Sorta feelin' the new Nicorette ad. It's clever/cute enough, gets the point across, and I think the tag line "Makes quitting suck less," is brilliant. More importantly, no ridiculous organization called, like-- Parents against Profanity or some other garbage-- is going to get its panties in a bunch over it. Why not? Because if any idiot claims that their 10 year-old's brain has been poisoned by the verb 'to suck' in the context of a Nicorette commercial, I'm sorry but s/he got bigger problems to worry about. Like why that 10 year-old is paying such close attention to an ad that promotes a product that aids in the elimination of a long-term, pre-existing addiction to cigarettes.

Do you think it's good, or idiotic? Tell me

Your daily dose of awesome

No no no no no, I assure you that this is not a joke.

I repeat,
not
a
joke.

Real.


Fill in the blank: If I had my own hover craft, I would ______________________ .

Here's a thought...

Subject to your own interpretation. Yeah.

Words to live by...

"If a thing is worth doing, it's worth doing badly"

- G. K. Chesterton

Something to Ponder

Men's figure skating took your breath away? I don't usually disagree with Dom but here im going to have to object. Men's figure skating is obscenely ridiculous. What I don't understand is why they have to be so flamboyant? Has there ever, EVER been a non flamboyant mens figure skater? What is it about figure skating that brings out this flair??

Now don't get me wrong, i have nothing against being flamboyant. But Im stunned that an entire sport can be that flamboyant. Is it a rule? Is it a requirement that there costumes are composed of 90% glitter?

I guess the question I am really getting at is can you ice dance and not look flamboyant? I think its possible. I think that it might be the next great thing for the sport. Someone who pushes the boundaries and moves the sport forwards. Minus sequins. Now that I would be impressed with. So I challenge the entire figure skating community. Can you do it? Only time will tell.